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Futurama episode
"War is the H-Word"
Episode no.	30
Prod. code	2ACV17
Airdate	November 26, 2000
Writer(s)	Eric Horsted
Director	Ron Hughart
Opening subtitle	Touch Eyeballs To Screen For Cheap Laser Surgery
Opening cartoon	Felix the Cat in Neptune Nonsense
Guest star(s)	Todd Susman as The P.A. announcer
Season 2 November 1999 – December 2000
I Second That Emotion Brannigan Begin Again A Head in the Polls Xmas Story Why Must I Be a Crustacean in Love? The Lesser of Two Evils Put Your Head on My Shoulders Raging Bender A Bicyclops Built for Two A Clone of My Own How Hermes Requisitioned His Groove Back The Deep South Bender Gets Made Mother's Day The Problem with Popplers Anthology of Interest I War is the H-Word The Honking The Cryonic Woman
List of all Futurama episodes...

"War is the H-Word" is episode seventeen in season two of Futurama. It originally aired in North America on November 26, 2000.

Contents 1 Plot 2 Cultural references 3 Bender's top 10 most frequently uttered words 4 Goofs

Fry and Bender enlist in the Earth Army to take advantage of the 5% military discount on chewing gum. However, within seconds of their enlistment, Earth declares war on Spheron I—a planet that commanding general Zapp Brannigan describes to his troops as devoid of any natural resources and possessing no strategic value whatsoever.

Concerned for her friends’ safety, Leela attempts to enlist, but is unable due to the Army’s men-only policy. While Earth’s flagship, the Nimbus, makes its way to the enemy planet, the soldiers undergo training. Unknown to anyone, Leela has snuck aboard disguised as a man under the name of Lee Lemon (“Leela-Man”). Brannigan finds himself strangely attracted to this new, super-competent soldier.

The troops are deployed to Spheron I and discover that the enemy is a race of sentient spherical creatures. In the first battle, Fry is told to hold back an assault while his fellow soldiers recharge their weapons. When the enemy charges, Fry’s courage deserts him and he hides in a hole in the ground while his squad is decimated. In an uncharacteristic moment of selflessness, Bender opens his chest plate and throws himself on a bomb, absorbing the explosion. After the battle, Brannigan sentences Fry to a demeaning punishment for his cowardice—becoming Kif’s assistant. Bender, now a hero, is treated at a field hospital.

As the soldiers regroup at camp, the Commander-in-Chief, President of Earth Richard Nixon’s Head, sends Bender and Henry Kissinger’s Head to negotiate with the Spheron leaders, the “Brain Balls.” While attempting to discreetly shower, however, Leela overhears Nixon and Brannigan discussing the true plan. While Bender was recovering, Nixon had a voice-activated bomb implanted inside his chest. The weapon will detonate with enough force to destroy the entire planet when Bender says “ass” (which is at the top of the list of words Bender says most frequently).

Leela and Fry steal a chopper and fly to the negotiating hall; in the process, Leela reveals her identity, to Fry’s amazement and Brannigan’s overwhelming relief. At the last possible moment, Fry stops Bender from accidentally activating the bomb. However, Bender realizes that he now has the power to force the Brain Balls to do anything he wants, including surrender. The spheroids reveal that Spheron I is actually their home world, and it is the humans who are the “evil invading aliens,” but Bender simply demands that they “get the Hell off [his] planet!” Without argument, the spheres all bounce into the sky and disappear; an Earth newspaper headline reads “Balls Thoroughly Licked!”

Back at the Planet Express office, Professor Farnsworth and Zoidberg confess that they were unable to remove the bomb from Bender’s body (“It’s stuck in there with glue or something. I don’t know.”). Instead, they reset the bomb’s trigger, taking it from the list of words that Bender almost never says. Despite Bender’s pleas, the crew refuses to tell him the new trigger word. (Bender successfully guesses “antiquing” after the fadeout, and an explosion is heard off-screen)

• The title is a reference to General William Tecumseh Sherman’s famous (but misquoted) statement, “War is Hell.” It may also be a dig at American television censors who often object to the use of the word “Hell” in animated shows.
• A sign outside a convenience store reads “Free bag of Ice-9 with 6-pack,” a reference to the fictional substance Ice-nine featured in Kurt Vonnegut's novel Cat’s Cradle.
• Zapp Brannigan briefs the troops in front of a large Earth Government flag, a parody of the opening scene of the movie Patton.
• The piñata lightsaber scene parodies the scene where Obi-Wan Kenobi trains Luke Skywalker in Star Wars.
• Bender is treated by a robot doctor named iHawk, which is a parody both of Alan Alda’s portrayal of “Hawkeye” Pierce (voiced by actor/impersonator Maurice LaMarche) from M*A*S*H, and of the Apple line of iProducts. The robot repeatedly flips a personality switch between “irreverent” and “maudlin,” a reference to the duality of the character of Hawkeye.
• An extended series of M*A*S*H jokes occur when Bender is evacuated to a mobile hospital.
  • A “Suicide Is Painless” sound alike appears in the score.
  • Many of the ensuing jokes are in M*A*S*H style.
  • The first scene between iHawk and Dr. Zoidberg is a parody of Hawkeye fighting with Frank Burns: Zoidberg as Frank, the unnamed nurse as Major Margaret Houlihan, and iHawk as Hawkeye.
  • Todd Susman provides the voice of the unit’s P.A. announcer, as he did in M*A*S*H.
  • The alienese on the tent translates as M*E*A*T rather than M*A*S*H.
• The list of Bender’s most frequently uttered words is presented in the same style as David Letterman’s Top 10 lists.
• The “Brain Balls” are a reference to the Brain Bugs from Robert Heinlein's Starship Troopers. Other references include the television war promo that parallels the WWII style patriotic public service announcements used in the movie.
• At the beginning of the episode, Fry contemplates the following gum brands:
  • Spider Yum (a reference to the urban legend that some brands of gum contain spider eggs and a nod to the brand Bubble Yum)
  • Hubble Bubble (a reference combining the Hubble Space Telescope with Dubble Bubble and Hubba Bubba brands of gum)
  • Liquid Nitrogum (a play on liquid nitrogen)
  • Big Pink (a parody of Big Red): Fry chooses this because it is the only gum with the “breath-freshening power of ham.” According to Bender, it pinkens your teeth while you chew (a parody of tooth-whitening gum). However, it turns out to be "all bones." Still, Henry Kissinger tells Fry his breath is "as fresh as a summer ham" days after Fry realizes it is bones.
• The outfits for the Earth Forces are of the same design as Imperial Guard from Warhammer 40,000 with the exception of the helmet fin.
• Zapp's disability of "Sexlexia" is from the word Dyslexia a real disability.

10. “Chump”

9. “Chumpette”

8. “Yours”

7. “Up”

6. “Pimpmobile”

5. “Bite”

4. “My”

3. “Shiny”

2. “Daffodil”

1. “Ass”

• Bender says each of the words on the list at least once in this episode.

• At the end, Bender says “I’m all right,” but the original captions say “Hootenanny?”.