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South Park episode
"Lil' Crime Stoppers"
Episode no.	102
Airdate	April 23, 2003
South Park - Season 7 March 19, 2003 – December 17, 2003
I'm a Little Bit Country Krazy Kripples Toilet Paper Cancelled Fat Butt and Pancake Head Lil' Crime Stoppers Red Man's Greed South Park Is Gay! Christian Rock Hard Grey Dawn Casa Bonita All About Mormons Butt Out Raisins It's Christmas in Canada
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"Lil' Crime Stoppers" is episode 706 of the Comedy Central series South Park. It originally aired on April 23, 2003.

The boys decide to play detective, and go around the town, solving minor "crimes." They first investigate the disappearance of a pie left sitting on the windowsill of an elderly couple's home. After examining the scene of the crime, they come to the conclusion (based on no evidence at all) that the husband wanted the pie, but as his wife wouldn't allow him to eat it yet, he decided to brutally murder her and dispose her body in a gruesome manner. Before he could go through with the plan though, the pie had already been eaten by their dog, where the boys found it. Horrified by their outrageous accusations, the couple hurriedly send them away but not before giving them the dollar they had promised.

The detectives next case involves the recovery of a little girl's stolen doll. They first suspect Butters (for no particular reason) and demand that he remain in Cartman's bathroom to produce a semen sample. They then get a tip, which they follow, and manage to recover the doll from Bill and Fosse's house, though they had to wrestle the case away from some kids playing FBI. The recovery gets them recognized by the South Park PD, and they are made Junior Detectives. However, the police lieutenant then begins to assign them cases that should be reserved for full detectives, including busting a meth lab, which, because of the actions of the drug dealers themselves, leads to the deaths of every suspect inside.

Other detectives mock the boys, and it is revealed to them that many of the cops on the force are corrupt and that the boys can do nothing to stop it (though they don't really plan to, or even care for that matter). The boys are then sent to a strip club owned by the leader of Colorado's greatest drug cartel, who was behind the original meth lab. When they arrive a shoot-out ensues, though the boys have nothing more than hands which they pretend are guns (while yelling "bang bang").

Cops show up to give the boys backup, but it turns out that two of them are working with the cartel leader, and they shoot the one good cop. They then kill the cartel owner, so that together they get all the money; one of those cops then kills the other, and then the last person he can't trust, himself. The boys are credited with cleaning up the police force, and are offered positions as full detectives. The boys, however, find reality more intense than their game, and decide to play laundromat instead, returning to Cartman's basement. Butters then arrives, declaring that, having tried for the entire episode, he has managed to produce a semen sample (he credits thinking about Stan's Mom's boobs). However, they aren't playing detective anymore, so nobody cares.

• The "Peppermint Hippo" strip club is a reference to the real-life strip club chain Spearmint Rhino.
• Kenny is seen without his parka on when the boys are undressing in the locker room, but you can only see him from behind.
• The cop named Murphy could be a reference to Robocop.
• The Boss at the Peppermint Hippo mentions moving the meth lab to the McKormicks' house before the boys walk in.
• Stan's clothing may be a reference to Detective Ray Nicolette from the Jackie Brown and Out of Sight.
• Kyle's' clothing may be a reference to Marge Gunderson from Fargo
• Cartman's clothing may be a reference to Detective Nicky Dimes from True Romance