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John Martin Kruk (born February 9, 1961 in Charleston, West Virginia, raised in Keyser, West Virginia in Mineral County the state's Eastern Panhandle) is an American former Major League Baseball player. He played baseball at Keyser High School in Keyser, West Virginia, at Potomac State College, and at Allegany Community College, He began his professional career with the San Diego Padres after being drafted in 1981. He played in such outposts as Walla Walla, Reno, Beaumont, and Las Vegas, before making his debut with the Padres in 1986.

The portly outfielder was dealt to the Philadelphia Phillies during the 1989 season, and he blossomed into an All-Star as the team used him primarily at first base. Kruk played in the All-Star Game in 1991, 1992, and 1993. In 1993, he had a memorable at bat when he flailed wildly at 98 mile per hour fastballs from Seattle Mariners pitcher Randy Johnson. Johnson's initial "Mr. Snappy" pitch was so far inside and above his head that the intimidated Kruk (acting like he was about to have a heart attack) backed up seemingly into the on-deck circle for the remainder of this plate appearance.

Kruk, who batted .316/.430/.475 in 1993, was also the leader of the Phillies' "Macho Row" which led the team to the World Series against the Toronto Blue Jays; in the losing effort, Kruk batted .348/.500/.391 in the Series.

During spring training in 1994, Kruk was diagnosed with testicular cancer after an errant pickoff throw from teammate Mitch Williams hit him in the groin and broke his protective cup. Additionally, weight gain and the astroturf at Veterans Stadium exacerbated his knee problems. After the 1994 season, Kruk was granted free agency.

Moving to the American League to serve as a designated hitter, Kruk signed with the Chicago White Sox. He was effective with the "pale hose", batting .308/.399/.390, but he was tired of the game. On July 30, 1995, Kruk singled and took himself out of the game. He left the ballpark never to play again. He finished his 10-year career with exactly a .300 batting average and exactly 100 home runs.

A quotable character throughout his career who later wrote a book called I Ain't an Athlete, Lady published in 1994, Kruk turned to broadcasting and commenting on the game. He has since worked for FOX, The Best Damn Sports Show Period, and local telecasts in Philadelphia. In 2004, he was hired by ESPN as an analyst on Baseball Tonight. He also writes a column called Chewing the Fat on ESPN.com.

Rather than be self-conscious about his decidedly non-athletic-looking body, Kruk would often joke about it. He once quipped that he needed two hands to haul ass. He also joked that the number he wore on the back of his uniform (#8) was actually his portrait. He has recently appeared in commercials for Nutrisystem with other retired athletes. In the commercials, he claims a weight loss of 32 pounds.

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John Kruk

• May 6, 2006 John Kruk Field was dedicated at Keyser High School in Keyser, West Virginia. John threw out the first pitch at the new field in a game against Beall High School.
• Provided funding for improvements to little league baseball fields in his hometown of Keyser, West Virginia.
• He has one testicle (the other was removed as a result of surgery to treat testicular cancer), hence the nickname One Nut Kruk. Presumably this is not an over-the-airwaves "Bermanism". (John "I Am Not A" Kruk is, however.)
• Typical of Kruk's (and Phils) roughcut style in the 1993 season, Kruk tore the seat of his pants in a hard slide during the final playoff game against Atlanta. He refused to change and wore the torn pants for the rest of the game. During the 1993 World Series, Kruk wore the same pants (with the tear sewn up), possibly for good luck.
• New Yorker baseball analyst Roger Angell speaks of Kruk's "batting and fielding and running the bases like a teenager", and of his "amiable back-fence chats" with opponents who come to rest on first base. He says Kruk's batting stance, with the bat held almost bolt upright, makes him look like a surveyor.
• The title of his book comes from a time when a woman chided him for smoking, being overweight, and being a poor example of a professional athlete. Kruk's response: "I ain't an athlete, lady, I'm a ballplayer!"
• He was hit by a pitch only twice in his career.
• Parents: Frank "Moe" Kruk and Lena Kruk of Keyser, West Virginia.
• Has three older brothers, Thomas Kruk of Ravenswood, West Virginia, Larry Kruk of Maryland, and Joe Kruk of Asheville, North Carolina.
• Currently resides in Mount Laurel, NJ with his wife, Melissa Kruk (nee McLaughlin), former Miss New Jersey 1999.
• Is not as disgusting as he used to be
• Is a big fan of cheese

• Baseball-Reference.com - career statistics and analysis
• The Baseball Cube.com - Career statistics and biography