Asspen
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| South Park episode | |
| "Asspen" | |
| Episode no. | 81 |
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| Airdate | March 13, 2002 |
| South Park - Season 6 March 6, 2002 – December 11, 2002 |
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| List of all South Park episodes | |
"Asspen" is episode 603 of the Comedy Central series South Park. It originally aired on March 13, 2002.
Contents |
The episode opens with the parents of Stan, Kyle, and Cartman contemplating spending a weekend skiing in Aspen. While the other parents say they cannot afford it, Chris and Linda Stotch point out an advertisement that offers a two-day stay for free in return for attending a thirty minute timeshare presentation. Excited, the parents decide to go to Aspen this very weekend, and the boys (with the addition of Butters, their new fourth friend since the permadeath of Kenny) set out to the mountains.
As the group wakes up to their first morning in Aspen, two timeshare salesmen, who introduce themselves as Phil and Josh, greet the parents at the front door and urge them to attend the thirty minute presentation. The parents, who had wanted to ski, reluctantly agree to attend. In the adjacent room, Cartman gives the sleeping Butters a Hitler, which he describes as "when somebody is sleeping and you put your finger up your butt and then, wipe it on their upper lip to give them a little Hitler mustache." The boys then go to the bunny slope to learn how to ski from an instructor. Their instructor, Thumper, teaches them the two primary feet positions: Pizza (skis wedged together) and French Fries (skis parallel). Ike attempts to go down the slope and crashes through the lodge wall. Later, when the boys are practicing, an older skier named Tad Mikowsky accosts Stan, calling him "Stan Darsh" in a failed attempt to ridicule his name. From this point on, the episode follows classic 80's and sports movie formulas, with the exception being, of course, that Stan and the other boys don't care.
Meanwhile, the parents are stuck in Timeshare Hell, the meeting having lasted for well over thirty minutes. After trying to entice them for over three hours, the salesmen are getting nowhere. Finally, Randy and Gerald can't take it anymore and announce that they and the rest are leaving. Seemingly accepting the decision, Phil asks the parents to turn over their table place cards, which they do. It turns out that their place cards have the "red sticker", which can be redeemed for one of three prizes. Meeting a flat refusal, the salesmen break down into sobs. Exasperated, the parents finally agree to claim their prize, which turns out to be an exclusive ski lift. Glad that their ordeal is finally over, they board the lift, only to discover with dismay that the lift deposits them in the same meeting room they had just left.
Back on the slope the boys are still practicing, until Tad, having stolen Stan's supposed girlfriend Heather (whom Stan is meeting for the first time), comes back and challenges Stan to a race. Stan agrees, with the condition that Tad will leave him alone if he races him. Stan loses the race, as he himself predicted, and is approached by a dorky teenage girl who calls him "really brave" and invites him to the teen youth center to dance. That evening, at the youth center, the boys discover that Tad's father plans to bulldoze the center (Stan, obviously, doesn't care). Tad then steps up on the stage and sings a song about Stan (Darsh Darsh Darsh Stannnnn Darsh), then somehow mistakens Stan's irritated response as a call for a rematch. The teens respond by saying that if Stan wins, the youth center will survive. Tad agrees, and declares the race will be on the K-13, the "most dangerous run in America." Kyle, unwilling to lose his best friend, especially after losing Kenny, tries to talk Stan out of it, but not even hearing the history of the mountain (explained by the old mechanic from Butters' Very Own Episode) will make him change his mind. At this point in the episode, Stan starts inexplicably caring about beating Tad. He goes to Thumper, and asks him for help training. Thumper agrees, and they along with the dorky teenage girl train to the appropriately titled song Montage.
The next day, the parents are still at the timeshare meeting, unable to leave. In desperation, they call the police, only to discover in horror that the police work for the timeshare company as well. Terrified, they sit down to continue the presentation.
As the big race down the K-13 proceeds, Tad has the advantage. Despite being clearly ahead of Stan the entire time, Tad stops three times to sabotage Stan's efforts. First, he cuts down a tree to block Stan's path. Then, he dumps sand to slow Stan down. Finally, he brings a cage full of hamsters with the plan of unleashing them to create havoc. Tad never releases them though. In order to make sure Stan wins, the dorky teenage girl stops Tad in his tracks by lifting her shirt. Stan wins, and the youth center is saved. Ironically and quite humorously, if Tad had merely run the course without trying to sabotage Stan, he would have won the race by a large margin just like the first time. At the conclusion of the race amidst the celebrations, the boys' parents, having finally bought some timeshare property, return and ask how the skiing was. The boys respond that it sucks, mainly due to the fact they don't understand the rules of this culture. They all leave for South Park. As the episode ends, the dorky teenage girl reveals what's really under her shirt: It is Kuato from the movie Total Recall, who then says the line "Quaid.......start the reactor."
- Much of this episode is a parody of the John Cusack Movie Better Off Dead.
- There is small scene that parodies Fred Gwynne from Pet Sematary.
- The song played as the boys drive into Asspen is Take On Me by A-Ha, an immensely popular 80's song. At the end is another popular 80s song, "Don't You (Forget About Me)" from The Breakfast Club.
- At the free lunch, all of the parents are eating lobster, including Sheila. Very much like pork products, shellfish is not considered kosher by Jewish dietary law, so Sheila shouldn't have been eating it.
In this episode, a song called Montage is performed by Trey Parker and Matt Stone's band DVDA. A video montage is shown as Stan trains to become a better skier. The song was later reworked and used by Parker and Stone in Team America: World Police. A similar scene appears in the episode Up the Down Steroid, where Cartman works on his handicapped act at the Special Olympics, using Push it to the Limit by Paul Engemann, the montage song from Scarface.
| Preceded by "Jared Has Aides" |
South Park episodes | Followed by "The New Terrance and Phillip Movie Trailer" |